She came out of my own Darkness Kissing me. Her lips filled with Poison killed Everything in me that denied my own God Self, where my Life Force was trapped in old concepts of being a Waitress of the Banquet of Life, where my Splendour was shrunk to absolute nothing. She unleashed the Grand Rivers in me. My sky was falling while She was determined to destroy everything in me that had refused to unleash the Truth about my own Terrifying Holy Glorious Divine Power and God Self. Where I had refused to Adore and be Mesmerized by my own Divine Beauty as a Woman fully committed to Love Unconditional.
She continued Kissing me slowly while She took my hand and walked me on the Razors Edge. There was no room for me on it, on this razors edge. There was no room for two of us. She became my personal Executioner, Exorcist and Guru. I was starstruck and hypnotized by Her terrible commitment that make me surrender completely to Her and let Her have Her way with me. She was Everything Wild and Untamed in me. She was Terribly Awake and terrible committed. Her terribly loving leave no survivors. She made sure nothing false survive. No wonder Her Power was feared and had to be denied for Aeons of Time.
Cancer revealed My Royal Regalia’s but She had already transformed them to symbols of the Fire of Truth. She unleashed my own Untamed Passion and the Terrifying Dangerous Freedom that I Am forced me to speak Life Anew. She insisted to show me how beautiful chaos is, She intended to make me feel that my rock bottom was a privilege and love it. I had to integrate Her Yeses, Her Life Force, Her Fire, Her power of Freedom and Her Light into my entire body and mind by Breathing The Grand. I felt a Majestic, Monumental and Mighty Peace Enclosing Me. My breathing went very slow and deeper than I have ever felt. I knew this was God. I had known this feeling and seen this Light my entire life.
I remember fully this Heavenly Presence, This Heavy Clarity that make me expand every time, demanding space, breaking every Limitations in me with the Truth and reveal my Own Knowingness about Home. In this I allowed everything unhealed, all traumas in my life have my full attention since every fear of dying had revealed my own wild but terrifying freedom. I was naked, I was skinless and my mind was in chaos because it had expanded beyond every human thought, it could no longer find any familiar landing, everything was unrecognisable and I was inside the raw breathing of the flames of my own cremation.